Thursday, August 12, 2010

Just let it all out

{Photo from here}

My goal yesterday was to see how many un-enjoyable things I could do at once. Like, reading Maxim magazine with Lindsay Lohan on the cover, sitting in the surgical waiting area of the hospital while two women bad mouthed my employer. I stopped at three.

Allow me to explain. My husband had a minor procedure done (a scope of his upper GI) at the hospital yesterday, which means there was a significant amount of waiting around for something to happen. I typically don't do well with waiting and realistically, the hospital is not an enjoyable place to hang out for hours on end. You know, because of all the old people.

So, while we're waiting in a room the size of a small bathroom, there are lots of sights and sounds to take in. People say weird things and do weird things; the hospital is just a weird place in general. As you can imagine, I find this to be incredibly hilarious. I enjoy laughing at everything, making fun of everything and NOT trying to tune anything out. It's my gift. We're sitting there, waiting, for what seems like an eternity while a cast of characters passes by the open door. My favorite character was, by far, Really Gassy Guy. Really Gassy Guy was wheeled into his room, very close to our room after some sort of gastrointestinal procedure. I knew that I was in for a treat when the nurse loudly proclaimed that "there's a lot of gas in there" and "just go ahead and let it all out." And let it out he did. It started simply enough, with a loud burp. "That's better!" he said excitedly. Then, it proceeded with a small, but audible, fart. "There's one!" he screamed.

I started giggling, because it was hilarious that he was A. passing gas and B. excited about it. My husband, who was trying to sleep, reminded me that I should just "learn to tune things out" and "think about something else." You know, he's right, I thought. I should learn to just ignore things! It's something I've been meaning to work on but just haven't had the time to perfect this skill. This is the perfect time to practice the improvement of my tuning-out skills.

Then, this happened: PFFFTTHHTHTHHTHT. The loudest, juiciest fart you have ever heard in your entire life came out of this man. If that wasn't enough, (because, clearly, it was not) he then screamed, "OH YEAH THAT FEELS SOOOO GOOD!"

I lost it. Again. Then, turned to my husband and said, "So, how's that whole tuning things out thing going for you?"

3 comments:

~Christina said...

i think those kind of things only happen to you and I... how funny! lol
Those kind of scenarios seem to find me where ever i go. I'm following from thirsty thursday.

Tag your it...
http://www/christinacage.blogspot.com

Steph S. said...

HAHAHA! Wow.... I totally would've lost it, too!

Kimberly said...

Great blog! Came across your blog from one of the blog hops, and looking forward to reading more of your stuff. I am now following on GFC, and FB NB (I gave you 5 stars!... feel free to follow back if you like!!!!
All the best,
Kim

http://amoroccan-acat-and-my-bigass.blogspot.com/

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